I'm very much a loner and I just love the way it is. I indulge myself into deep thoughts and hell, gotten myself into trouble this time. See, I've never told anyone about my internal feelings except Ben. And now he's gone, I'm lost. No, we did not break up. Because his attachment has started, I had to adjust myself to him not meeting me for the whole month. Maybe 6 months. I don't know. I am still adjusting myself to this new "climate". And I can tell you, it's not easy. I've amazingly survived for 6 days and 1 day more its gonna be a week. It's never easy because like everyone says, I'm too over dependent on him. Even his mom agrees with this. Yes, I depend on him a lot. I've YET to become independent. I don't know when I'll be but soon it will. Because I need to. I can't possibly be dependent on him for the rest of my life. For all I know, I'm very lost now. Facing the computer almost everyday and I even went to the extend of borrowing books from the library to keep me occupied. Attachment is a killer because it "kills" your other half emotionally. And I know that he's been trying his best to sms me and call me when he has got the free time. But tell me, when do chefs have any free time? They work round the clock.

And his temper isn't very good these days because of work. :(

When can I see you again?