Half way.

I'm so half way into doing things. Bad bad.
Term break in a week's time and I am seriously gonna make full use of it to... study!
Since everyone started working when my break is arriving. No more chill outs.
Nevermind!

I'm so sleepy. Yawnz.

I'm so sad.

I'm feeling so helpless.

Kiki is in so much pain. Sigh.

I'm very scared..

Very very scared.. I feel like crying.. Seeing him like this makes me feel so useless.

He can't tell me what he want and where the pain is..

I suspect its Arthritis. His vet said it 2 years ago that there will be a possibility that Kiki will have arthritis. 

:( :( x1000

Sigh..

I'm gonna head out now to source out for glucosamine.

Hopefully it will ease his pain and he will recover by Saturday.

If not, gotta bring him to the Vet.

Please pray for Kiki to have a speedy recovery.

Thank you.

:) -> :(

Missing Ben so much. :( 

Don't know why he look so fugly in this picture. 

So not him leh. Why so weirrrd. 

HEHE! I like this picture because I've got dimple! 

HAHAHAHAAA! Don't know why.

& only if I am this fair. Shiok ah!

MISSH BEN VEHLY MUCHIE. 

Oh. And my dearest boyboy seems to have hurt himself. 

:( 

Didn't want to "up" when I told him to. But he walks perfectly fine.

Whats wrong? I'm so scared.

Ben asked why?

Ben asked me why didn't I blog these few days. Hahahaa! 

Anyway, I'm so busy busy with my school work. :( Projects dateline are drawing near. ICAs are coming. Semester exams are on September. Time passes damn fast. I need a breather. I keep having panic attack these few days. Damn sian about it. 

This year is so different. I need to learn to be independent. Its a challenge on everything. Only seeing Ben for a day per week. This suck. 

Our 5th year is coming and this year, its not gonna be a celebration. It falls on a Wednesday and he's in camp. :( He told me that we can celebrate it earlier or later but it doesn't hold the meaning anymore. Nevermind, I understand. 

I want you. By my side. 24/7. But thats impossible. :( Miss you baby. 

AFA test tomorrow, wish me luck. I need lots of it. Thank you very much.

Hearts

It is gonna be another end of the week again. Time passes damn fast and I'm loving it so much. Reason being I get to see Ben faster. But a no no thing is.. If time passes fast wouldn't it be the time spent together with Ben passes damn fast too? Yes right.. :( 

Its okay, because I know both of us can definitely make it through this 5 months together! I've got faith. :) I can't wait for Saturday to arrive! Its gonna be fireworks, tao huey and then to his place! Yay! Ever since we got together, watching of fireworks is an every year thing except for last year because his boss refused to let him take off that day. 

Every year's fireworks holds special memories to the both of us. Every single year.. 

1 more to day to go! 

Anyway, after dinner, I sat down and talked to Mom for an hour. It has been years since I really speak to her about everything from the bottom of my heart. Maybe because, I always think that she does not understand me at all. But today, it totally proved me wrong. I talked to her about how I felt and what is actually going on in my life. She accepted it and even said that I've grown up and had actually straightened out my thoughts. Well, thats what I think so too. I've finally grown up and see life's as another aspect. I guess.. I really have to spend my time with my parents more because I can see the wrinkles and grey hairs already.. They are already in their 50s, still working and supporting me through my studies. I'm already 20 and have yet to earn a single thousands in my bank account. Such a disappointment I must say. All I could do is to blame myself for being such a badass teenager back then. 

They forgave me time and time again. I guess, its something called parental love. Now, let me study my diploma, earned it and start earning my thousands 3 years later. Its never too late. I want them to have a good life and have them travel around the world. 

Its getting late. School's at 10 tomorrow.

Ciao.

Only love.

I know I sounded harsh but I just wanted to....

Sigh. I hate how things work sometimes. I wish I can be ignorant about everything.

Ben told me, "If you cannot beat them, join them". Yes, true, make sense.

If you ever tag me in this, you die.

I hate it when people actually say this.

"Had a fun time catching up with YOUR just now."

I know its none of my business but I just had to give a damn about it because it fucking annoys me. Like big time. FFS, can you tell me what does your sentence with that "YOUR" means?

Did you mean something which isn't meant to be said? For example, you enjoyed your day out with your friend's pussy or dick?! Thats why you decided to miss that word out? If you don't get what I mean, I'll tell you what I mean. 

"Had a fun time catching up with YOUR - just now."

Get it?! If you still don't get it, its either I suck or you suck. Probably the latter. 

I know what their "YOUR" means. It simply means you all. Then... it slowly turns to YOUR... :( Because humans are fucking lazy then you all you all you all your.. 

Why can't you say something else rather than YOUR? Like maybe "Had a fun time catching up with you guys just now!" OR "Had a fun time catching up with my girlfriends/boyfriends/sluts/bastards/gays/lesbians just now!" 

If you ever tag me in a post saying that fucking word to describe you all, Imma _|_ to you. Because it fucking irritates me and whenever I see it, I get angry. Pms you say. For what fuck you care. I PMS I happy. 

Its Friday!

I love lurb lurveee Friday!

Its the day when I can see Ben after a week! 13 more minutes to his book out! Yayyy! Missing him so much!!!

There's something wrong with my personal homepage project. Why can't that bloody thing move to the bottom?! Please don't tell me to re-do all my projects pwease! Dateline is on next Thursday. :(

You fucking homepage, better fucking work! UNDERSTAND ME?! Humpf.

Hehehehee!

I wanna cut my hair again! Yay, again again! The process of keeping it makes me angry. When your hair is at shoulder length, its the most ^#&^@^#*. You have to blow it, spray it with some hair straightening product and volume it!! Its so damn troublesome! And sometimes, your hair just refused to be "guai" that day and it decides to defy all the products you used. Ta ma de! I freaking hate it when it starts to here curl a bit there curl a bit and then your whole hair looks so weird. Sigh. 

Hair ah hair, please be guai and make me pwetty. Don't make me look like a siao char boh, I very happy. 

3 more minutes 3 more minutes!!

Feel like going to Bakerzin to have dinner and I wanna have my Macaroni in tomato broth with clams. Yumtum! *slurrrrp* 

2 more minutes 2 more minutes!!

1 more minute 1 more minute!!

I wanna go Gelare and have their ice cream waffle!! Oh, B&J's ice cream waffle super nice and fattening! 

6pm!!

BYE!

I wrote this on 11.59pm

Paint my love. 

Its Friday now! Yay!

Its the weekends.

Its the day when Ben is gonna book out.

Its rest time.

Its play time.

Its movie time.

Its good food time.

Its everything to do with Ben time. 

Projects kill brain cells big time. Fucking hate it. I regret. Why are there so many regrets in life? Why can't one be content with what they have? Why am I the one who is not contented? Fuckkkkk. Anyway, don't come bullshit with me and tell me don't live your life with regrets. The problem is, WHO DON'T?! Whatever. 3 years pass by quickly please. I'm already 20 and I'm still studying. Not a degree. Sigh. 

Anyway, I wanna rant. I don't understand why my school wants me to submit my academic transcript. FFS. Do they know how troublesome it is for me?! Moreover, they kept piling us with all those fucking projects and ending school late kind of shit. You tell me I where got time to go collect my cert! 

AIYA fuck la. FUCK EVRYTHING. 

I very buay song now. Thats it.

Miss

I miss those days when we can meet up whenever we want and head to somewhere to have some fun. :(

For now, weekends are always for Ben. Weekdays is for school. I've got no personal time left. :( Projects due date are drawing nearer. I can feel the pressure sinking in. I always do my tutorials on Wednesdays because I know all of my weekend time would be with Ben.

I'm tired already. 

Goodnight & I hate this life.

I'm so glad.

So... It was a very very extremely simple day spent with Ben. He came over and we had prata together. I tell you, my house here the prata very nice. Freshly made and piping hot! Bought some tidbits from Fairprice. Back to my place and we watch Shutter Island. Like fuck la the show. I mean like it's freaking confusing and initially we thought that it was so nice! The ending part can go suck whatever. Googled for the conclusion but everyone concluded differently! Waste my 2 hours. 

How to train a dragon next! Damn cute and I thought toothless is gonna die and I told Ben that I will cry if it does. & he laughed so hard. Funny meh? -.-

Slacccck. Stalked people on FB. Damn funny. And we started drawing and drawing and drawing. Compete against each other's drawing. Lol! Then he said he wanted to draw me. So I was like.. Okay..

Ben: Come come I draw you.
Me: Okay! Must be pretty one.
Ben: Confirm pretty and look like you.
Me: *eager* Okok!!
*covering the picture he's drawing with his hands*
Ben: TADAH~

KA NA SAI~ Look like me meh?! Totally don't fucking look like me la!! And you guess who he's actually drawing that he thinks that it look like me.

FUCKING DORA THE EXPLORER!!

I got nothing to say. My boyfriend after all these years only know that I look like Dora the Explorer which is damn fucking lame. :( I can go die liaoz.

I am never gonna agree to let him draw me again. At least draw me as Barbie doll mah.. Simi fuck this Dora the Explorer shit.

Hedgehog!

I want a Hedgehog as a pet & it can be best friend with my hum ji dog! 

All images are from Google. :) And hehe, look at the ears!!!

SO CUTEEEEEEEEE! /pinches