I was contemplating if I should blog this out. But after much consideration, I feel that I should..

You know, the day when I finally gave you up was the day when you told me off as being unfriendly. What the fucking shit is this? Tell me, how long have you met her? Knwoing her for just merely 3 months. I've known you for a fucking 9 years and be with you for 6 years and you fucking labelled me as act cool and unfriendly towards her. Oh wow.

At that point of time you don't know how hurt and angry I was.

If I'm unfriendly, I wouldn't even be giving her two fucking cigarettes. Tell me, why would a smoker not have cigarettes with them? Don't fucking give me excuses that her bag is small. No matter what, she will still fucking squeeze that pack of cigs into her bag if she smokes. You know, I can choose not to give her any AT ALL if I'm unfriendly. Tell me, how am I unfriendly and acting cool when I offered her?

What's with knowing me for 9 years and knowing her 3 months? It doesn't mean anything at all anymore. And let me ask you, how much do you know about her for that 3 months?

After that day, I finally saw how much you've changed. You judged. You fucking judge me. You made use of me.

You know, that's it. The end of everything. Whether or not I'm not gonna wish you any best of luck because you don't even fucking deserve it.

Bye

Relationship; JB

I'm really surprised how people can get in and out of a relationship that fast.

One reason that may happen is probably when one or both parties don't treat the relationship seriously. Probably love don't even exist when they both got together. 

I simply can't do it. I don't understand what others are thinking. You wanna get into a relationship is cuz you love that person and you want to be with that person. How can one get into a relationship when love doesn't even exist at all? Probably that's what you guys called the no strings attach kind of thing. 

All I can say is, I'm not ready to get into any relationship at all. I'm too comfortable living in the past that I forgot what I have to do in the present. I really don't know what I want. And I know I'm pretty much fucked up because I've led people on. This isn't something that I wanted. Now, we're not even friends. Avoidance was so obvious. Sigh. But it's okay. And I don't wanna rush into any relationship. Not finding one too. 

And probably, yes, probably, the best relationship I had was the 6 years one. 

Anyway, emotions aside. JB was fun. And Melvin was really sweet to drive us around JB. Happy day! :D 

Happy with what I have now. Hopefully it's gonna remain this way till I graduate and go Aussie for my degree. Till then, I'll be a happy girl with no relationship problems to worry about, living a carefree life! 

I'm still me

Probably the best smile I had while I'm at Alberto's place. 

Happiest day of my life after 4 months.

Not gonna let any fucking thing affect me.

The difference

The difference from where I stand and where she is standing is...

She's a lot prettier than me.
A lot taller than I am.
A lot slimmer.
Good in her English.
Atas like anything.
Rich.
Smart.

Me?

What do I have?

A dog.
A few hundreds.
A lot of fats.
Short.
Vulgarities like free flow of drinks.
Average looking.

The only thing that I can be on par on would probably be my English. That's all.

Jen, now you know where you stand. What the fuck are you waiting for? Skies to turn grey, flowers to wither and mind to be fucked?

I is sad till cannot sad till I feel hurt. Full stop.

Me be back

I'LL BE BACK TO MY FOOD UPDATES AGAIN! 

<3

TOMORROW IT SHALL BE!

STAY TUNEEEEEE. HEEEEE.

MY LOVELY PEOPLE ENJOYING THEIR MALACCA TRIP.

YOU GUYS ENJOY AND SPAM ME WITH PHOTOS THAT MAKES ME JEALOUS.

TRI ALREADY DID THAT. MA DE THAT PU BOR. LOL!!

ME LOVE TO SLEEP IN OVERSIZED TEE. 

ESPECIALLY MY BF'S ONE. HAHAHAHA!

NIGHT.

Cut cut hair.

Hair short short.

Jean Yip people so scary, make me feel super uncomfortable.

Funny hair stylist who accidentally knock the hairdryer on my head and then helped me to rub it.

Everything is just weird. 

Not gonna return to that place anymore. 

Thoughts

You know, there are many things running through my mind now to the extend that I'm feeling confuse. I don't know what to do anymore.

Why would I even want to do that in the first place? Now that I screw things up, it seems that I screwed us up. Sigh. Blame it on the drinks. Seriously...

Anyway it's okay. The longing feel of having someone to hug and love is no longer present. I just wanna be happy and content with what I'm having right now. Live each passing day as though it's my last. I'll probably feel happier this way.

I can't wait to go AU to get my degree. Just need to leave this place and discard everything away. FYI, I'm not avoiding all the problems I had on hand. It just seems that some stuffs there isn't any solution to it.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Satisfied

CRAVINGS FOR DURIANS SATISFIED. WOOOHOOOOO! :D ALL THANKS TO CY BABE. <3

TOMORROW USS WITH MY BABES. WOOOOHOOOO!

BEEN SO LONG SINCE I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO EVENTS!

Aquanova night

Great night, great drinks.

I think I blog too much today.
Okay, last post!!

Happy Moments

People whom I love so much.

Pictures can be as far back as 2010. 

Miss those times.

Miss my EMRS days.

:(

Sigh. We're gonna be separated once school reopens. Like seriously? :( 

And I love my babes so much. We talked about EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING. They, who know me best. So glad to have them by my side.

Love my JOOGWEES. Simply super duper funny when we hang out together. Laugh like mad!! 

Love my brotherlyhood!! Talk cock partners. Especially Tri, although 2 years younger than me but he doesn't behave that way. 

<3 <3 <3 <3

Roses are pink!

SUPER LOVE MY SAMPAT SELF. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

BRO LEFT. OMGAH~

SEE MY NEW EARRING SO CUTE RIGHT I KNOW. 

BUAIZ

Leaving on a jet plane

 Farewell dinner was great. Happy me when I got home after spending some quality time with fam. 

I don't know if I've blogged about it before... But Bro is leaving us to Aussie for 4 freaking years. :( Happy and sad for him at the same time. I'm like super duper close to him. Although he's super strict to me during my secondary school days but I don't know why the closeness was still there. In fact, his strictness really did benefit me a lot. If not, I wouldn't have become what I am today. 

Can't imagine him leaving me and my sis just like that. I don't even know who should I look for anymore when things just fucked up. Maybe it's time to grow. Be independent... And I really hope within this 4 years, nothing goes wrong. I swear it's worst than a break up. Much much much worst..

Okay.. I don't know what to blog about anymore. Just that this week was a happy start but a bitter ending. Nevermind, it's okay. It's gonna be mistake that I'm not gonna repeat it twice. :)

**

"What are your words when you don't really mean them when you say them?"

我也很想有一个人来疼爱我。

Dafug

做什么都可以，就是不可以出卖自己。

To be frank, I've not been home for the past 3 days. 

All I did was to come home to bathe, brush teeth, change into a fresh set of clothes, feed kiki and within 4 hours later I'm out again.

I promised myself to be a no strings attached thing. No misses, no love. Seems that you broke the rule. 

3rd tat

So I was planning it for a long time whether to put a third tattoo not.

This time it shall be a quote. So recently, I found this quote that really makes sense. Well, to me.

"Turn wounds into wisdom."

This shall be it. Probably another $200 gone. Since my Sis did her wordings at Johnny Too Thumb and it cost her $200.

Hmmm.. Need to find the nicest font. Hehehe.

Shit, I'm getting addicted.

Been so long since I was being hugged to sleep.

STAYOVERRRR

IM ALL SO HYPED UP RIGHT NOW NOW NOW.

JOOGUIS COMING TO STAY OVER TOMORROW AND WE'LL HAVE STRICTLY PANCAKES ON FRIDAYY! WOOHOOO!

HOW AWESOME IS THAT?! 

I THOUGHT I'LL END MY DAY REALLY BADLY.

BUT HEH IM SO WRONG!

WENT FOR A MOVIE WITH K AND SOME SMALL LITTLE CHATS.

THEN CAME HOME AND SINGSING AND I TALKED ON FB. 

GOT ME ALL HYPED UP! 

SERIOUSLY, I SHOULD STOP LETTING CERTAIN EVENTS AFFECT ME SO MUCH. 

HEHE HAPPY.

Sampat is me

Complications

Fuck it. Seriously, just fuck it. Everything is just so sucky right now.

Just fucking gotten myself into another shithole. Maybe I'm just destined to be like that. All alone.
And I really don't fucking understand why do we have to end up this way.